Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Let's call it what it is.

Celebrity gossip is a guilty pleasure in which I occasionally indulge yet hate to admit. However, a recent article (or more of a blurb) on usmagazine.com needs to be addressed. Khloe Kardashian recently admitted to “losing her virginity” at the tender age of 14 to an 18 year old man. In this article Khloe says that she felt conned, persuaded, and uncomfortable due to the age difference. She also tells young women to not “let anyone pressure you.” As I read through the comments no one seemed to pick up on the coercion and power dynamic in this experience. Did no one see the immense power that an 18-year-old man has over a 14-year-old child’s agency? A commenter by the (ironic) name of “SweetPea” says: “No one needs to know you were dumb & whorish at 14!” Ah yes, the familiar slut-shaming and victim-blaming tactics.

As I read this blurb I felt outraged that no one called this experience what it was. An 18 year old coercing a 14 year old into sexual intercourse is rape. It is not being dumb. It is not being whorish. It is not losing your virginity. It is not sex. It is rape.

The fact that the “moral or the story” was to not “let anyone pressure you” is also disturbing because it victim-blames and places women in the age-old position of gate keeping. It is not my responsibility to not “get” raped. It is the responsibility of my sexual partner to obtain sober, uninfluenced, and verbal consent from me. The only person who should feel guilt, blame, and shame in Khloe’s story is the rapist.



  1. I completely agree with you. Thank you so much for sharing this. This type of thing happens far too often and the girl generally blames herself...

  2. Great post, we need more voices like this out in the media